Happy New Year!

Wow 2004 is coming to an end! Can you believe it? This year has really flown by.

In January of 2004 Cle and I set out on our adventure of investigating adoption agencies and look at us now! Well versed in all of the adoption lingo and the ins and outs of the process and waiting for our little bundle.

The year 2004 has served as a platform for new beginnings. I am not one for New Year's resolutions. I learned long ago (I guess about 4th or 5th grade when they used to make you write them in school) that they never really stick. However, as I approach 2005 and my 30th birthday I am in great anticipation for what lies ahead. I am very optimistic about the coming year and would like to have a more positive outlook on my life and the world around me. I have been blessed with a wonderful husband of 5 1/2 years, and a great group of family members and friends. I have a greater appreciation for my many blessings and I feel a greater need to give back and as Oprah would say "use my life".

I am reading a book for my book club this month, called Brick Lane. I was really inspired by a quote from the book and would like to pass it on to you all. Brick Lane is a novel by Monica Ali and it tells the story of a Bangladeshi woman (Nazneen) who lives in London with her husband through an arranged marriage. She doesn't know English and she lives in sort of a compound with other Bangladeshi families. In a conversation with one of the older Bangladeshi woman (Mrs. Islam), Mrs. Islam admonishes:
"If you think you are powerless than you are, but everything is within you, where God put it"

I leave you with those words on this last day of 2004, Peace and Blessings to you and yours!

Merry Christmas to All

Seasons Greetings!


I hope you had a VERY Merry Christmas! From Our House to Yours.

I Just Need to Tell the World

Or at least my little world, the wait is driving me CRAZY!!

I am trying all they say to try. I am focusing on preparing for our child. I am doing things that have nothing to do with preparing for our child. I am trying to live out our last moments of freedom. Nothing works! I am still anxious. Wondering when will it happen? Will it be a boy or girl, will we get to meet the birthparents, will she choose us and then change her mind, what if we're in over our heads. Everyday the questions change.

Last night after spending a weekend of trying not to wait for baby, Cle and I attended a baby care basics class at a local hospital. It was FUNNY! We thought this would be a good way to spend our waiting time constructively. We knew everyone in the class would be pregnant which was fine. Everyone was HUGE and pregnant. Everyone was due in January and February. So we couldn't even try to blend in the class if we wanted to (I am no skinny Minnie but I dont look 8 months pregnant either!) so of course everyone is looking at us like "are they in the right place?"
Then nurse practitioner has us go around the room and introduce ourselves and due date. Cleveland gives me the "you speak for us" look I take my cue and cheerfully announce
"HI! We're Cle and Sylvia and we're due ANY DAY!"
Hilarious! Even the nurse practioner looked at me in utter confusion! After a brief pause I said "we just finished our adoption homestead and we are waiting to be matched with our baby, and we thought we would use our time constructively and learn how to actually take care of him or her!"

There were lots of wow and smiles and we felt more comfortable. It went great. This is the second class of this type that we have taken. It's not that I feel bad around pregnant people, or I have anything against them. I wouldn't begrudge anyone the joy of carrying a child just because I'm not. It's just that ometimes it's just weird being the only non pregnant person that's all, and then explaining our plans to adopt and being on defense for rude or inappropriate questions.

I guess we will have to field inappropriate questions for the rest of our lives in regards to adoption. I've heard stories from other adoptive parents and from group sessions we have been in through our agency. That is part of the purpose of this blog, to keep all of the important people educated. So I will keep you all posted as interesting things arise, and I try to stay SANE!

No News is Good News....Right?

There is no news on the baby front. We are still waiting for a match. It is really nerve wrecking! About a month ago it was exciting to be expecting without a due date, now it's just spending everyday wondering could this be the day, someone chooses us to be parents?

Sometimes it feels sing songy "This could be the day, OH this could be the day La La La La"

Other days it feels very anxious: "Could this be the day? PLEASE let this be the day!"

Well I guess it's like Mama says " a watched pot never boils" But I can't help but wait with great expectation you know. Cleveland and I have been trying to take everyone's advice and savor our time together alone. We do have a great appreciation of our 5 years of alone time, being able to pick up and go when we want, wherever we want. Sleeping late, going to bed early or late as we want. But we still fantasize about how our life is going to be to be different when the baby comes. We have trying to stay busy and not "watch the pot" by doing little projects around the house, buying baby items and on Monday we are scheduled to take a baby care basics class. We'll learn how to bathe the baby, diaper her etc. That should be fun.